Hadar…swing and miss…

Prologue:

I feel the need to post to the journal about our miscarriage, and so while you may see a note or two about it below, and some of the impacts, this post is more about my stats than my journal of how I’m doing, how I’m feeling and other items that came up for me.

Last week: dedicated to introspection, jogging and finding time to meditate & committing to jogging and knocking off winter weight.

Or, as it turns out, not so much…

Enrollment goal:

Last week: Consider: (a) What’s holding me back? (b) If I am overthinking the process with my friends? (c) Why I occasionally feel the grungies with the work?

Well, I never took the time this week to fully explore these questions, partly because I attended both the Basic graduation and the guest event on Thursday night. Another factor was after learning that we miscarried I turned to the LP community for love and support. Combined, I re-engaged with my love for the work; the amazing possibilities it creates for people; the amazing supportive community it generates, and how positive & beautiful the environment is. 

One of the impacts from this engagement, community reliance, and remembrance of how quickly someone’s life can be impacted (such as my elevator conversation), was that I told 2 friends last night about the next date and will follow up to ensure that they register.

COMMITMENT!!

Work goal:

From last week – To Dos: Explore this tension between asking lots of questions and feeling good about doing so.

To Bes: – Be vulnerable, open and input-seeking to feedback from my supervisor and team members; Be communicative; Be systematic and organized.

Accomplishments:

  • Finalized the contract for the April Dinner event and sent out the invitations!
  • Locked up a reception speaker and 3 panelists for the April Tech Talk!
  • A bunch of meetings!
  • Asked a TON of questions
  • I shared the news of our loss with my co-workers, and both asked for and accepted their support in handling my responsibilities so that I could be with Naomi at the hospital today.
  • Other stuff I really can’t recall right now!!

I felt like I made more progress last week on the Being than I did on the Doing. I had a great call with my buddy, the crux of which was for me to stop focusing on simply ‘asking questions’ or trying to generate ‘humility’ and instead am focused on being a counsel-seeker.

I’m going to continue exploring this last part – being a counsel-seeker. Additionally, I’m going to focus on supporting Naomi and getting support for myself in coping with the loss of expectations for starting a family.

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