Keep your limiting stories to yourself, thanks.

This is my first week of not having a job (but still having a paycheck) and I have been trying to enjoy some of my newfound free time, but people are stressing me the f*ck out. Almost everyone I talk to, who knows my job situation, projects onto me their fears, their worries, their stories. It makes me not want to talk to anyone, because all I get is other people’s anxiety with comments like “OMG, what are you going to do?”, “If I were you, I’d be freaking out”, “if it was me, I would have been looking already”, etc, etc, etc. With all of this type of energy directed my way, I can’t deflect it all and some of it does get to me and makes it hard for me to relax and enjoy things that I want to do :-/

Even after I explain to people that I am still on the company payroll for up to 3 months and that then I get my severance package of another 2/3 months of pay, people still make me feel like taking a few days off for myself to relax and regroup is a big mistake and that I should finding a job ASAP.  
Let’s hope I am not mistaken in wanting to take some time off from the rat race. I’d just hate for people to tell me “I told you so”, fingers crossed, I’ll be the one saying that.

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3 thoughts on “Keep your limiting stories to yourself, thanks.

  1. Orlando – one of the BEST things I have ever done in my whole life is take the three months off between jobs last summer. And I gave myself the stretch of actually taking the time, like, embracing it. No looking for a job. It was riskier for me than you, I did have some padding but not much. Even so, I had wanted a break like that for a LONG time. I wasn’t about to squander it by crazily looking for a job and spiraling into anxiety and stress. Besides, I knew I had a solid resume and I’m good at what I do. When I was ready for a job, one would appear. I decided to just trust that, and my gut agreed with me.

    Family freaked out. Friends sent me job leads almost every day. I struggled at first, but then I just went for the stretch of embracing the time, 100%. I worked out, I spent lazy days in the park, I traveled, I went to the beach, I made tons of plans with folks I hadn’t seen in forever, I fell further in love with Jimmy, it was incrdedible. Looking back on it now I can feel my cheeks, like, glow.

    You know you will be totally fine and you will get another job. You KNOW that. Trust that! It totally is just THEIR stuff. And they don’t intend at all to hurt you or stress you out, they are just concerned about you and stuck in their crap. But PLEASE give this to yourself! You deserve it, and when you do go on to the next thing, you’ll be that much more ready for it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Orlando, I’ve been thinking, you’ve mentioned a few times about how other people’s stories and expectations influence yours. What if you just didn’t let what other people have to say affect you? What if you didn’t care what they think? What if next time someone said you should start looking for a new job you say, “thank you for your concern but I’m going to take this time for myself. I have no doubt that I’ll be ok.” I know it’s easier said than done. But it’s definitely something to practice. I feel like there’s this silent acknowledgement that we should all follow a certain lifestyle. The consensus being that we should have an office job with a certain pay…forever. How about room to grow? We have to remember, and not to sound pretentious, but most people haven’t done the work. Most people are stuck in a scarcity context. They think taking time off is a risk because “jobs are scarce, money is scarce, oh no hurry panic everything is scarce!” But as we know this is not true.

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