It didn’t occur to me not to join this cycle, even though I was leaving for 2 weeks of it. I am fully aware of how much I get out of this community and how much I need it. That being said, prior to leaving and while I have been traveling, I have been feeling a bit bad about my level of participation. I haven’t really been reading posts (we bought a SIM card but it doesn’t work and we rarely have wifi) or checking-in in the way that would make me proud of myself as a group member.
Selfishly, being part of this cycle has been great for me…especially while touring. There are many things about this trip that have been challenging – seeing some of the conditions that people live in, interacting with certain demographics, and making sense of it all from a larger perspective. However, with the focus of my goals in the back of my mind, I have been able to deal with all of this from a different perspective. Maybe it’s an avoidance technique or a defense mechanism, but either way it is working for now and it is definitely something I have noted that I must process post-trip.
One of my goals is to find different ways to heal, take care of myself and eliminate the avoidance techniques that don’t serve me. While here I have embraced the opportunities to use my time and emotional resources differently. For many reasons, but mainly because I have a new level of perspective on my life. My goal is that these will carry over into my day-to-day life. Also, I have embraced (less by choice and probably more at fate’s hands) the idea of disconnecting (my phone) in order to roam. It is quite liberating.
As I spend time thinking of my relationship with myself as a professional (no, I didn’t apply for jobs this week), I am highly aware of how I deal with people here – on every levels and also from a business perspective. I have also been paying attention to how I do in tense or crisis sitatutions. Needless to say, I’ve learned a lot. To sum it up (since I had a 15 hour tour day which started with sunrise at the Taj Mahal), I am quite pleased with myself. My formula for success includes a supportive husband, tips from my mom and the knowledge from advanced ed. This experience has made me feel better about my strengths and my abilities and I know I will go forward with a new level of confidence. I didn’t exactly fulfill my weekly goals and per usual, I was committed to the ‘being’ and not the ‘doing’. Hmmm…
May the 4s be with you!