Stats for real this time

I have 2 goals this cycle: wellness (sleep! Execize! Eating food that nurtures! Meditation!) And creating integrity with my career. 

The wellness goal covers a lot of ground. The sleeping part is still really hard for me, and part of that is a long commute and the nature of the work day.  We have got to figure something better out, people.  I am having a serious scarcity conversation about work and “my time”.  Like, there are not enough hours in the day, which is not supporting me, because there are exactly the right amount of hours. I just have to get better at using them.  I have been working out MUCH more regularly, not always hitting the target (4 morning workouts during the week), but I am working out 5 days, which beats 1 or 2, sometimes after work, and sometimes on weekends. It really keeps the boogeyman away.

As for work… it’s a nebulous goal and this is what it means: always do my best at work. Take personal reaponsibility. Notice what needs to be done and do it. Create a career path and start walking it.  SO. I am needing to learn to quiet my mind at work. I’m realizing how sensitive I am to other people’s energy, and my thought go wild. This is where the meditation comes in, but I want to get into the practice of mind clearing at work.  It shifts me big time, so I can be a glorious and productive employee.

I have a networking meeting this week with someone who’s job I want someday, and i am using this as an opportunity to start the career path mapping (and network expanding).  I started a class with some friends AND my job is also signing me up for a class (stretching ‘ s what I DO) and I am going to take it (vast improvement from two weeks ago when my ego was like, “I’m sorry, what class? And I’m gonna learn things that make me better at my job. Bingo).

It feels kind of like something Naomi talked about in her post; I make goals and my life starts to conspire with me; the momentum is with and through and outside of me. Good stuff.

Hope you all are feeling powerful- cause you are. And it’s a gift to behold.
 

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3 thoughts on “Stats for real this time

  1. How do you, and do you, budget your time? Same as you’d budget money. I’d start just by witnessing. Where does your time go, and how often are you wasting it? Just like with money, when you take a look, sometimes you end up getting surprised. When I cut social media/news out of my mornings, suddenly I magically could do twice as much in 20 minutes. I don’t know that this is your solution, but just an idea. Tony Robbins says: “Activity without purpose is a drain on your life.” How often are you engaging in activity that has no purpose w/r/t what you want/who you want to be? This is where I’m at–trying to create a budget for my time and cut out time-wasting moments.

    On the integrity part, something stuck out to me in the Basic. Sylvia (the trainer) said that we think we can break our word when no one is watching, but, the Self is ALWAYS watching. Always witnessing. It stuck out to me because I hate breaking the rules — but I believe I am smarter than the rules. I can get 5-6 steps ahead of the rules. That means for MUCH of my life, I’ve been working around the rules. I’d ditch class, but always call the school first, as my mother — I perfected imitating her speech. I’d not read or study in law school, knowing that if I just kicked into gear 3-4 days before the exam and did marathon hours, I could still do well. At work, I’ve played a procrastination game. Get instant gratification now of being comfortable, surfing the net, etc., because when the deadline approaches the resulting time pressure will push me through. It all works. No one’s the wiser, usually. The school never knew I ditched. My law school grades were good. My boss seems unaware of any procrastination issue.

    The problem? My Self was alllwaaaayyys watching. Always. Watching, and judging. Then when it comes time for Kyla to start her blog, or start writing her book, guess what my Self tells me? “Who, you? You who does nothing on time, ever? You who procrastinates constantly? You who skirts around everything? HA. You’ll never write any book. Quit dreaming, sweetheart, and get back to that internet slideshow of ‘Celebrities You Didn’t Know Were Dead.'”

    I say all this just to support you in thinking about what’s at stake. It’s not just about doing a good job, or creating possibilities in your career. It’s directly connected to how you experience yourself, and your self-worth. And THAT is connected to who you are when it comes time to take a risk, be in relationship, etc. I could be wrong, but my experience of what you wrote above is that you still have it that being a great employee is about being in integrity w/r/t your employer. The key, though, is being in integrity w/r/t you. I’ve skirted and my employer was none-the-wiser. It could be my work product had I started early instead v. when I procrastinate is identical. It could even be that the procrastinate model produces BETTER work. I know what matters, though, is that I keep my word — because my Self is there watching, and it starts to lose faith in me when I don’t.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. OMG, this is me.
      Taking on being aware of how my unintentional & my intentional-but-not-worthwhile procrastination impacts me…I think this is part of what plays into my constant guilt, and the impact is both to my spirit and physically to my poor, aching neck.
      Thanks!

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    2. Whoa. I felt that. Thank you. You’re at a seriously high frequency coming out of this training.

      I don’t strictly budget my time, as I see a lot of value in being present to opportunities as they arise, and I love being with people (so if my roommates come home, 9/10 I’m gonna hang out). The nice thing is that I have created a life in which the people I’ve surrounded myself with are positive influences, so I may change my plans to coincide with my boyfriend or my roommates, but we’re probably going for a run or cooking a healthy meal together, which to me is a bonus. I can absolutely look more authentically at where the time is going at work- thats where I am more often avoiding emotional discomfort or fighting boredom (while I am learning a lot, the creative side of my brain is atrophying), and seeking out instant gratification. So I’m putting a big-post it on my desk top that says, CHOOSE PRESENCE. Because the self is always watching, you’re totally right.

      I recognize the truth in needing to notice when/if I am in integrity with myself- its an important distinction because growing up, we were a family big into white lies and fibbing (IME, that may be a story). You’re absolutely right, I need to start being the true north for myself- without the boss looking over my shoulder.

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