Goal 1- Create a loving, trusting, and supportive environment with my family
Last Thursday morning, my husband, our son and I laughed together. It was so spontaneous and wonderful. The joy on both their faces was priceless. Then I realized I did not recall when we last laughed together as a family. Based on this revelation, you would think it was all doom and gloom in our household. Am I in denial? If you ask me I would say we are a loving and happy family that do many fun things together. I would also tell you how grateful I am always for both my husband and son. This got me thinking if we were so happy and grateful, why would we not laugh together more? Our family got along so well as week one progressed that I thought I have met my first goal. I felt so connected with myself and my family, why would I not keep this up?
This is the second week, and today my son kept asking me why am I yelling. I told him defensively I was not yelling since I did not raise my voice, but I knew I was caught. It was the tone of my voice, that critical tone I take on with people. Being critical is my automatic. I did a quick scan of my emotional state and felt disconnected, distracted, and annoyed. I was not being loving, but I was trying to do “loving.”
Goal 2- Learn to Meditate
Is it me or does everyone feel anxious during meditation? I’m researching and testing the guided meditations as well as going it alone. The stress I’m feeling during meditation is a bit off putting. I will not give up, this is not in my DNA. Perseverance is my middle name.
Goal 3- Change my last name
I decided to take this on even though it is more of a task. I have not made much process on this front. I did narrow my name down to two options from four.