This past week I have been consistent with my meditation. 10-20 minutes each day. Thanks Emily for posting the comment about Insight timer ! I find this helps me get present with my being in such a powerful way.
I met with one of my colleagues to discuss a book we both read, Intentional Living, and how we could incorporate the principles of how can we serve others in our daily life at a higher level. What was remarkable about our conversation was how he described being in service to his mother from a loving place. This provided perspective on my get to conversations about my Dad. I truly get to be his care provider.
Speaking of my Dad. I went to visit him last weekend and can I tell you he physically looks AMAZING. He looks healthier than when he was living at home by himself. I felt so good. I felt like yes I did this besides all the literal work financially and doctor wise I did. I created a place for my Dad to feel loved. This small home has more one on one attention. I keep his old Careprovider going by daily to continue love, my best friend visits weekly and I come monthly and get us all together to celebrate and eat enjoying each other’s company. My shift was powerful when I arrived, I was handed a stack of medical bills. Basically all the hospital bills from my Dad’s accident were sent back by insurance uncovered. What did I do? I grounded myself before and did something nice for myself. Result: I glanced at the bills set them down with no frustration, stress or anxiety. I chose to step left ignore them and remember my higher purpose was to create love with my Dad and friends. The bills can wait till I am back in NY. Time is short. #winning Mentally my Dad’s condition is detoriating slowely as can be expected with his disease. He wants to marry his new care provider (or thinks they are already married) so she can get her a green card. Now he is asking me to take his wife shopping etc etc. I am handling this gracefully and while I am certain to make mistakes I will keep moving forward.
Google hangout with my buddy really got me going and was the highlight of my week. Before our hangout. I didn’t know too much about my buddy. After 10 min of our call I just felt seen. She really got me. (remember that exercise in Advanced?) It was so cool how I had described me and my goals and situation to her. In my mind I described a very challenging road ahead with so much to work on or change about myself so I would have more to offer. What did she hear or better yet see? Quite the opposite. She saw my diamond and reminded me of what I have, am and will become. It was so powerful. I had been approaching my being goal subconsciously from a checklist to do list on things I need to change (although I didn’t say it..I was thinking fix) before I could get what I wanted. My buddy pointed out I don’t need to change myself. Shifting how I approach situations includes shifting how I see myself. #love I needed to “be” …”just be me” “authentic me”
So, this week I am ready to get out there dating again and put back up my online dating profile and show others “me”.
Also my procabulary online course I have done daily. This week focused on the principal of what we talk about in Advanced Ed, “if it is to be it is up to me” They frame it as Projection vs Reflection. So appropriate for this week as I get to acknowledge what I have created and am creating for myself and my ability to change and choose my narrative and in turn my life.
On the connection front I shared videos sending love to friends that were celebrating birthdays in different cities, and a video update with my cousin. I have maintained daily phone calls with my Dad.
Overall, I am incorporating small pieces of what we practice in my daily being. Shifting changes my come from, my perspective; not me. I am awesome.
As I am finishing up this post I just got a text from my business partner, I had texted him that March 1 was the 8 year anniversary of me starting my business and that I was grateful for all he had done to keep my vision alive and make it what it is today including our new expansion. His response, ” It has been a pleasure to be part of it. I am grateful for what you started and the sacrifices you made along the way. The commitment to your vision and willingness to grow, adapt and sacrifice, no matter how uncomfortable it has made you feel is what has made it what it is today. You should be proud of yourself as I know you have made your Dad very proud” For those of you that have followed my history up and down this was a great to be on the same page and understand one another.